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Nun In A Cab


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A cabbie picks up a Nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome Cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring. He replies: "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you." She answers, "My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am And have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and Hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could Say or ask that I would find offensive." "Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me." She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic." The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and Catholic!" "OK" the nun says. "Pull into the next alley." The nun fulfills his fantasy, with a kiss that would Make a hooker blush. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying. "My dear child," says the nun, "why are you crying?" "Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish." The nun says, "That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party.

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Here's another "religious person" joke for you:

The Pope is in the US and is getting fed up with the people like aides and security that constantly surround him.

He says - "I want some time to myself". An aide says - "the President has put a private car at your disposal with a highly trusted driver - why not go for a drive around and chill out?"

So the Pope is in the back of this nice car (with blacked out windows in the rear section) and he says to the driver _ "This is a Jaguar isn't it? - I always wanted to drive a Jaguar - can I have a go?"

So the Pope gets in the front and the driver gets in the back...

The Pope is a bit over-enthusiastic and get pulled over by a traffic cop...

"Step out the car please..." the cop say to the Pope.

So the Pope gets out...

"Wait there" says the cop - and phones his Captain at the precinct...

"Look boss" he says, "I think I might have stopped someone really important..."

"Not the mayor again!" says the Captain

"More important than the mayor!" says the cop

"oh no! Not the President!!!" says the Captain

"More important than that!" says the cop

"More important than the President! Who is it for ****'s sake?"

"I don't know - I don't like to look" says the cop, "but you won't believe who his driver is!!!!!!"

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