ThaHodgehound Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 I pulled a 12 today! On my feets ALL DAY!!!!!!!!!! gives me 60 for the third straight week!!!!! I AINT DOIN NUTTIN TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!! It's MY day!!!!!!!!!!! Gonna be lazy and play on the computer!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitsune Posted June 19, 2010 Author Share Posted June 19, 2010 Yea for fathers day !!! >Don't Fart in Bed > > > >> >This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. >> >The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting >loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and >the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every >morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was >making her sick. He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day >he would blow his guts out. The years went by and he continued to blast >them out! >Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for >dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she >had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts >and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs >where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling back >the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and >emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts. Some time later she > > > >heard her husband >waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a > > > >blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the > > > >bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the > > > >floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she > > > >had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came > > > >downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his >face. > > > >She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, "Honey, you > > > >were right." "All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to > > > >you." "What do you mean?" asked his wife. > > > >"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts >out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of >God, some Vaseline, >and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThaHodgehound Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 EEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!! AND wifey too!!!! She said Ga roossssssss!!!!!!!!!! LMAO!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitsune Posted June 19, 2010 Author Share Posted June 19, 2010 Don't tell me she won't be thinking about that the next time you fart in bed...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThaHodgehound Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 ROFL true, true!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stirfry Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 that was awesome! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nana Posted June 19, 2010 Share Posted June 19, 2010 Good one!!! And something to keep in mind. LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitsune Posted June 19, 2010 Author Share Posted June 19, 2010 In celebration of Fathers day !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JagSol Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 Wow..poor thread is dying here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThaHodgehound Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 RC AIRPLANES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThaHodgehound Posted June 22, 2010 Share Posted June 22, 2010 OOOUUUUCHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL **it happens! Elevator broke during the dive and I could not pull up!! hee hee My other nickname is StickKiller! http://www.youtube.com/watch_videos?more_url=%2Fmy_favorites&video_ids=gJeDe1nAB2k%2Cz2BgjH_CtIA%2CVYRAI1arB8c%2CoSKQ9Celhmw%2CdPBiA9tZxUs%2Cyava7pLvSqs%2CWvo-g_JvURI%2CWfP77Lo3x20%2CuXDjylJaO3k%2CdrB_THlH_So%2CWL0gToNeGcI%2CXRCbkBfdBrQ%2CBWbzId0vQGM%2CX69vuU7y5tM%2Cmutb7KgA9NM%2C01E_6oxvlQA%2CAcR5j-V7X1k%2CP-oQ--U-WaQ%2Ce-_b45ug0t8%2CkEx5BleUlpE&type=7&index=5&no_autoplay=1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitsune Posted June 22, 2010 Author Share Posted June 22, 2010 Rest in Peace And now for something totally off topic : Excerpts from a Dog's Diary 6:00am - At last! I Go Pee! My favorite thing! 8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing! 9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing! 9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing! 10:30am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing! 12:00pm - Lunch! My favorite thing! 1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing! 3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing! 5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing! 6:00 pm - They're home! My favorite thing! 7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing! 8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing! 11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing! Excerpts from a Cat's Diary Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitsune Posted June 23, 2010 Author Share Posted June 23, 2010 I love this screen cleaner !!! http://www.raincitystory.com/flash/screenclean.swf Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JagSol Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Ya know where to get a keyboard key cleaner by any chance? My moms is looking for one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FTJoe Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Ya know where to get a keyboard key cleaner by any chance? My moms is looking for one Serious? Computer, lappy, desktop? I hit it with a can of compressed air (CVS, walmart, etc.) and Windex. The air will blow horrible stuff out so beware. And don't spray the windex on the keyboard, just on the paper towel so its damp. Then wipe each key with a little pressure, not crazy so they pop off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JagSol Posted June 23, 2010 Share Posted June 23, 2010 Thanks! I'll tell my moms that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThaHodgehound Posted June 26, 2010 Share Posted June 26, 2010 since i got a web cam i figured might as well get SKYPE............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nana Posted June 26, 2010 Share Posted June 26, 2010 Gonna do any reviews with that web cam? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThaHodgehound Posted June 26, 2010 Share Posted June 26, 2010 Yeah! IF I can ever get the house quiet enough!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitsune Posted June 27, 2010 Author Share Posted June 27, 2010 Lock your self in the car with the windows up....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThaHodgehound Posted June 27, 2010 Share Posted June 27, 2010 Lock your self in the car with the windows up....... it so hot here that if I do that, I don't know what will die first, me or the computer! LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitsune Posted June 27, 2010 Author Share Posted June 27, 2010 put in a swamp cooler????? Getting ready for my road trip to california--17 hours of nothing. Currently we have hail, thunder (window shaking loud), rain, wind.......maybe even a tornado (small ones). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JagSol Posted June 29, 2010 Share Posted June 29, 2010 Damn! All we got here is a small sprinkle of rain and endless heat! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeffb Posted June 29, 2010 Share Posted June 29, 2010 I have weiner dogs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snubber Posted June 29, 2010 Share Posted June 29, 2010 That's what I like about you Jeffb....always thinking about your weiner..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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