I Really Hope This Is True

[keenan]

My Uncle sent me this e mail, I dont know if its true or not, but HOW cool if it is true !

AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.

Date: 2009-05-27, 1 :43 a.m. E.S.T.

I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I

hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend,

threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and

earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather

important message.

First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect

you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took

my jacket. The even ing was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket

for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911

.45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster

for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very

intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!

I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from

with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking

bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet

with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to

come help mug us again].

After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your

cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and

filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas

station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took

150 gallons and was extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along

with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]

I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was

parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and

keyed the entire driver's side of the car.

Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma

Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a

little over a day now, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed

to get in twothreatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the

FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.

The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess

while he traced your number etc.).

In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel

this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your

threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of

these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have

the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path

you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so

lucky.Have a good day!

Thoughtfully yours,

Alex

P.S. Remember this motto ... An armed society makes for a more civil

society!

[TheGreen]

That was pretty cool. My wife said she read this one once before. If it is true, if think there will be a new employee at the local McDonalds.

[nana]

I absolutely loved this one!! Even if it's not true, there are some great ideas in there! I only wish I was clever enough to think of those kinds of things - even if only to write them and not do them. I'm kinda hoping it is true. LMAO

[Travis798]

I've read that, and variations of for a while now. I'm thinking that maybe somewhere, the first one posted was true, and then copy cats followed. True or not, it makes a good story!

[BirdDog]

On Snopes.com, this story is listed as "undetermined". It doesn't matter if it is true or not. This story is hilarious!

Thanks for posting it!

[ddavelarsen]

Yep, I'm with the rest of you - don't care whether it's true, it's a great story - with a moral. I guess all great stories have a moral though.

I've never been able to figure out whether Iowa is a conservative or liberal state. I think we're just after money, and to heck with political persuasions. But in my county at least, the Sheriff (county sheriff determines the extent of concealed carry in Iowa, by county) believes that an armed society is a safer one. Shortly after I got my CCW a pizza guy was held up at gunpoint. He also had a CCW, and shot his attacker in self defense (didn't kill him). The state did not press charges; the sheriff got on TV and made him a valued citizen. Of course, Pizza Hut fired him.

Carrying a weapon is a huge responsibility. It's not for everyone. But I believe that where honest citizens with proven skill and discrimination are allowed to carry at their discretion, society is more civil. The criminals have to think twice - their intended victim might not be a victim at all.

[Brian]

Of course, Pizza Hut fired him.

Excuse me?

On what grounds?

[ddavelarsen]

Excuse me?

On what grounds?

&nbsp;They don't allow firearms.<div><br></div><div>Edited to add: They prefer victims. Victims are more politically correct.

</div><div><br></div><div>One more edit! Sorry for all the tags that got in there somehow that I can't get rid of!</div>

Edited December 27, 2009 by ddavelarsen

[nana]

I agree with you completely dave.

Nebraska is supposed to be a conservative state, but somehow they elected Ben Nelson and look what he just did. And for the first time in our history, they split our vote for President. Makes me wonder. Although, I think it's still mostly conservative.

[Brian]

Yep, I'm with the rest of you - don't care whether it's true, it's a great story - with a moral. I guess all great stories have a moral though.

@Dave - I was just checking out your web site (nice BTW) and I do believe if someone tried to hold you up with a knife you'd pull a Crocodile Dundee on them... "that's not a knife, this is a knife".

[ddavelarsen]

@Dave - I was just checking out your web site (nice BTW) and I do believe if someone tried to hold you up with a knife you'd pull a Crocodile Dundee on them... "that's not a knife, this is a knife".

Thanks for looking Brian! Knives can be beautiful, which is something the uninitiated don't expect. When my buddy was first trying to introduce my wife to me, he called me "Dave the Knifemaker." She's going, "Yeah, that's all I need; another biker!" Little did she know -- knives can be beautiful. She fell for me.

[ddavelarsen]

nana, I'm not sure whether I prefer conservatives or liberals. Neither, I guess. They're both nuts. I'm too moderate for polite political discussion! Everyone disagrees with me. That said, I'm sure on the conservative side when it comes to the Constitution. What a wonderful document; I wish congress would believe in it again. But it really isn't friendly to the bottom line for corporations, which is a serious downside for politicians.

I'm really thankful that we have diversity of political views here. Knifemakers are generally very conservative, and not often big on 'thinking.' Party line for knifemakers. My father sometimes rues the day he decided to teach his kids to think for themselves! But he's up for it. My father is a great man, one I'm deeply thankful for. But we sure get into some hairy political discussions! (He's a dyed-in-the-wool conservative; just say "democrat" to him and sit on back! )

[nana]

I think I like your dad, dave.

[ddavelarsen]

I think I like your dad, dave.

Me too nana, though it took a while much to my own discredit. They don't come any better than my father.

[DannyBoyfromWashington]

@dave Heyas, can ya post the link to your knife site? I am a knife aficionado myself and would love to see what you have. I believe that if 2 people are within 15' of each other and one has a gun(that is not already aimed) and the other has a knife, then the person who has the knife and knows how to use it will most likely come out on top. link the site please

[ddavelarsen]

@dave Heyas, can ya post the link to your knife site? I am a knife aficionado myself and would love to see what you have. I believe that if 2 people are within 15' of each other and one has a gun(that is not already aimed) and the other has a knife, then the person who has the knife and knows how to use it will most likely come out on top. link the site please

Agreed! Here you go:

Stuff I've Made

Don't take me too seriously though, I really am just a hack. Just a hack who knows what he likes.

I will also edit to add that it's great to meet another knife enthusiast!

Edited December 27, 2009 by ddavelarsen

[keenan]

Great Posts ! My wife and I have our CCW here in Florida.Of course, here in Fla, pretty much the only requirement to get one is to have a pulse. It was great when we went to Missouri, every state we drove through recognized our permits as valid. I too, was HEAVILY influenced by my Father. He was 1st generation Irish. HIS father came to the U.S. under an assumed name as he was running from the British. He was a member of the Micheal Collins gang. MY father became a NYC Detective. My mother was born in Kilkenny, Ireland. So its no wonder Im just a leeetle bit stubborn. When my dad retired, he moved to a town in upstate NY called Walton. He was the Mayor for 2 terms (died during his 2nd term).He was SOOO loved by that town, his funeral was on TV, the papers, it was surreal. The 1st night of his wake, the phone rang, I answered. It was Gov. Pataki calling to say he was sorry he couldnt attend. The town built an Olympic sized swimming pool and a park and named it the John J. Kelly Memorial Park. Try fillin those shoes. So yes, there were some HEATED discussions on politics in our house. Luckily, I was always on my Dads side, my liberal brother, however, didnt fare so well. But it was always friendly arguments, never any animosity afterwards. And THATS what I love my Da for the most, he ENCOURAGED us to form our own opinions. And didnt love us any less for disagreeing with him.

Edited December 27, 2009 by keenan

[ddavelarsen]

Very cool keenan; I like your Dad too. Wish I'd had the opportunity to shake his hand.

This makes me wonder if being raised to think independently might have something to do with us all being vapers? I mean, it's not obvious and it's not exactly easy; it's just the right thing.

[nana]

That was nice, Keenan. I think I would have liked you dad, too.

You may just be right, Dave. Good observation.

[DannyBoyfromWashington]

Agreed! Here you go:

Stuff I've Made

Don't take me too seriously though, I really am just a hack. Just a hack who knows what he likes.

I will also edit to add that it's great to meet another knife enthusiast!

Well, I checked out your site and I gotta say I love "Danny's skinning axe" so is it really mine? joke. But seriously, really nice work

[ddavelarsen]

Well, I checked out your site and I gotta say I love "Danny's skinning axe" so is it really mine? joke. But seriously, really nice work

Well, 'fraid not. That went to my other friend Danny. Sorry man - and in case you thought about asking, no - I'll never do that again! That picture's been published the most of anything I've ever made. Most recently in an art book called 500 Knives. That made my day too! But coming from another vaper, I think it means more. Your kind words mean more than I can say -- and still sound like a man.

So - back on topic!* I've gotten a couple more bumper stickers ready to go and they'll all hit the PO this morning. I still have some left, so don't be shy folks. Time for a congress wake-up call.

*I know keenan will be proud of me.