Holiday Greetings

[StringDancer]

Here's my rant on the Holidays. I wrote it today and have posted it on a couple other sites, but felt there might just be a few sympathetic eyes over here, as well. Wishin' myself luck in that regard....

Oh Joy… the Holidays are here again! I can barely contain my enthusiasm… can ya tell?

OK, I'll admit, I'm not big on the Holidays. It's not that I mind the commercialization of the season all that much anymore… all the buying and selling seems a welcome respite from the overtly religious aspect of the season, actually. I mean, religion's all well and good, and I support anybody's desire to infuse their days with the comforts of religion if it suits them in any way. But having looked at every major and several minor religions in some detail over the years, I've pretty much dispensed with all that personally, so the babe in the manger stuff, while exceedingly precious, doesn't do all that much for me anymore. So make a note to yourself… study comparative religion at your own peril.

However… as I look at the Holidays (the which I consider to be under way once Halloween comes), I do have my preferences.

Now, Halloween is just plain fun and games. Dress up funny, have fun with kids, indulge in our closet vampire fantasies and enjoy scary, gory flicks. Chocolate is legal for all. So far so good… if you don't mind snarf-faced little demons demanding booty simply because their parents encourage it.

Then comes Thanksgiving, which I actually kinda like… in theory. I know I've a great many things for which to be thankful, and it's good to reserve a day just for that. The food is excellent, and the Native American in me can mourn the day we didn't scalp those friggin' palefaced mo-fos the minute they set foot ashore. The world as we knew it pretty much went to hell after that.

The very next morning brings us to Black Friday, when the barn door breaks and the animals all run to Wal-Mart. Suddenly, it's a four-week feeding frenzy in every store in town, traffic sucks, and normally sane, self-possessed people go crazy with shopping, pontificating, more shopping, spending hours watching old Christmas movies, even more shopping, visiting family, traveling to artist colonies to spend way too much on shopping, repeating and reliving ad nauseum the Santa Claus story till they're blue, etc etc… all leading up to the penultimate night, Christmas Eve, when everyone's broke and/or way over-burdened with fresh debt, and you can't get the infernal sounds of bells and shakers outta your ears.

And all that Christmas music, my God… every tune is either insufferably perky, or else moribund and solemn as the grave, even though the holiday is ostensibly about a birth. Go figure.

However, I do like the chord progression to Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas, a classic tune written by Hugh Martin and Ralph Blane. Sentimental yet jazzy. I also have a fondness for mistletoe for reasons anyone can guess.

Christmas Day itself really isn't all that bad. For one thing, the entire country pretty much has the day off, except for those unfortunate folks who must keep the wheels of commerce in motion, even on what many would consider the most "sacred" day of the year. Some things never change, and generating a cash-flow no matter what certainly leads that list. I do enjoy a snow-blanketed Christmas day as much as anyone, I think, and relish the chance to sit by the fire and drink eggnog heavily spiced with rum, my cholesterol be damned. [insert for VT folks... anyone know of a nice cranberry ejuice?]

Being a Gentile, I cannot meaningfully comment on Chanukah, and being Caucasian, must take a pass on Kwanzaa, as well. I'm not exactly a Pagan, either (though some in my immediate family would argue that point), so the Mithraic beliefs and associated holidays I hereby reference just for the hell of it. Anthropology is a fascinating subject, no?

Thankfully, once Christmas is over, we have a week to settle down, regain our composure, only to prepare to party like we're insane once again come New Year's Eve, from which rivalry we hope to recover on New Year's Day (thankfully, again mostly an off-day for the majority of the country). Resolutions are made and promptly broken, yet there remains a purpose of sorts to arbitrarily signifying one instant in an entire year to turn over a new leaf and begin a fresh cycle in the horror of existence yet again. In spite of everything, one shudders to consider a world with no New Year's Day starting off the calendar. Like God, if there were no New Year's Day, humans would have to invent it.

And in my case, I have yet another holiday in January… my birthday. But here again, the sheer magnitude of my accumulated years makes this day increasingly distasteful. I can't giddily celebrate my birthday anymore… I both fear and revere each one as possibly my last, and a reminder of my mortality and approaching demise.

Not that I really fear dying all that much. At least then I won't have to hear all these damn holiday songs.

Now, some of you might label me "a scrooge". Certainly my dear wife has, though to her credit she doesn't chastise me for my irreverence too much. I think I've turned out this way because of my hypersensitivity to the disenfranchised. A holiday should be a personal thing, I think. Circumstances in our own life dictate that we take a day off, and so we take it wholeheartedly and enjoy it without reservation or guilt. Scheduled, communal holidays, on the other hand (while laudable in concept and intent), can only be fully embraced by those who are, frankly, in the mood to be happy. And with the world seemingly winding down to its dismal final days, how many of us are really in the mood to be happy this year?

For the rest of us, the Holidays are an annual reminder of innocence lost, of prosperity and creature comforts unattained, of goals and objectives and dreams we hold near and dear side-tracked, delayed or having left the station altogether… without us on-board. It's easy to be happy during the Holidays if you're a bank CEO (or some another so-called "master of the universe" sucking the teat you lucked onto) and can buy your way out of the year-end funk that encroaches upon the burgeoning masses. But for those trying like hell to fashion a tolerable Holiday season with the few (and diminishing) resources at their disposal; for those bereaved, sad, laid-off, depressed and disappointed by life, the Holidays can be excruciatingly painful. Suicides always peak during the Holidays, and that fact alone should give us all pause as we move through these final days of the year.

And to be fair, there are legions of poor and not-so-poor folks who manage to keep their perspective, consider their blessings, and take heart from all the goodwill flowing through our lives right now, however contrived, manipulated, redundant and vacuous it may be. For these fortunate souls, the Holidays can be a chance to regroup, rededicate, and serve as a reminder of what's really important in life… love, family, and a good guitar.

Not to worry, though. Enjoy this year's festivities, by any and all means, as it most definitely could be worse. Holiday doldrums should peak two years from now, when a growing gang of jittery 2012 doomsday believers will be utterly convinced that the 2011 Holiday season is destined to kick off the final curtain on a rather long and tiresome show. And who knows, they may be right… even if it turns out that it's the damn doomsayers themselves who create the catastrophe in the first place.

I can hardly wait.

Santapult: the elves finally have enough

[keenan]

WOW ! That was one of the most honest, humerous, insightful, poetic posts Ive read in a LONG time. I have to say, I agree with a large portion of it as well. While I am Irish-Catholic ( where I come from you HAVE to put the Irish in there ), I have strayed a little from the church. I do believe organized religion has turned into more of a business sensed faith than a religious entity. I have always like George Carlins description, God is all powerful, miraculous, can turn water into wine and feed the masses with a loaf of bread, but he's not so good with money, so we need to give every Sunday. Im ALL for helping my fellow man or anyone whos down and out, but it seems the people that these churches continually help are those who WONT help themselves. I read SOMEWHERE this week, I have no idea where I read it, but someone said "This year, instead of going to the MALL every day from now until Christmas, lets all go to CHURCH everyday". Now, THAT would put me in the Christmas spirit. Christams lately has NOTHING whatsoever to do with the birth of Jesus. And sometimes I wish he WOULD come pack and pull another tantrum like he did in the marketplace way back when. The holidays have become much like our political process, on a certain day and time we start the clock to see who can reel in the most dough. The child that gets an xbox 360, a widescrssn TV, and a surround sound to play it through does not appreciate Christmas half as much as the child that is looking forward to seeing his family ALL together for that one day. Well, I see Im off on ANOTHER rant here, so Ill stop whining. From the heart, I wish EVERYONE here on Vapor Talk a MERRY Christmas, and a safe, happy holiday season. Ho, Ho, Ho !!

[stubear62]

I too, enjoyed your post String. Brought a tear to my eye as this will be my VERY first yr that I WON'T be wit FAMILY I have been pushed aside to be forgotten and be slapped in the face by my Wife. Yes, thats what I said. She has decided to move out of my home in Sept and left me be. Took sides with her children and I know why. But to talk to her mother and belittle me to the point that I am no longer liked and to be refused to come enjoy these Holidays. I will be alone except my dogs, George nd Diamond. Even my exwife has taken my 2 children away from me with blatened lies, so I won't hear from them again. My wife now just couldn't for the life of her, take the crap that came when I became disabled. I didn't expect it to happen nor did I understand it either. I have to live with it and I still belive in my vows as my wife ran away from hers. I know, I am having a pitty party, as my wife would say. I use to LOVE the holidays until 3 yrs ago. I just don't like it even more this yr. cause she left me and had her mother ban me from her home.

I am not religous nor have I gone to church (except to be married and to lay people to rest). I now have to indure the same as my mother did, but she had always been that way she told me. Lonely, ashamed and disgusted with the holidays. Me, I am just lonely.

Sorry for being like this. I just needed to open up, I guess and relieve my tension with in myself.

Sorry to ramble on.

[vapemudgeon]

Two words...... BAH HUMBUG !!

[StringDancer]

God bless you, Stu. Your story exemplifies why I have such mixed feelings about the holidays. When life is good, so are the holidays, usually. But if life is kicking your butt, the entire holiday hoop-la can be difficult beyond words.

The holidays are a double-edged sword... joy and misery. Call me crazy, but I can't seem to disregard one in favor of the other. Joy without awareness of the misery is myopic, and so is living in misery without remembering that joy is possible and available to us if we're strong enough to survive the hard times.

So hang in there, bro. No one can promise that life will get easier for you, but the potential is always there. Be strong, and keep looking for the opportunity to pull yourself out of the funk. It may be right around the corner.

[Gazoo]

Wow i thought my hubby was the only one like this. every holiday I make him go to family homes even though he would rather the holiday pass without mention. If it wasnt for our little ones I dont know if I would win the struggle.

My hubby became disabled about 3 years ago and was put on horrible meds high dosage pain relievers like morphine and methadone. that made him lock up in our bedroom for about 18 months considering our oldest child is only 6 now hubby missed a lot. and although i felt like a single mother for a while we have made it through. Where ever the road leads he now knows I am with him til the end, as i know even if it takes a while he will fight the devil for me and our children. For that i will celebrate my heart out this year broke or not. My children will be excited when they open their used nintendo 64 nope not a wii, the clothes they need anyway, and a few little toys i collected on sale through the last couple of months since i started vaping and saving the money. May we all find the happiness in simplicity and innocence.

Edited November 26, 2009 by Gazoo

[StringDancer]

..... May we all find the happiness in simplicity and innocence.

Amen to that, sister.