Fell off the wagon yesterday

[spydre]

Hubby knew I did, so no point lying about. Just sitting AROUND my sister while she smoked wouldn't have made me smell of smoke as much. And I probably still had smoke on my breath even though it had been around three hours since I had one of my sisters.

I tell you, when I was a smoker - not all that long ago - I HATED menthol analogs. I would take one if I was out, and menthol was the only thing that anyone around me had, but I wasn't fond of it. LIke smoking a regular cigarette with a peppermint into your mouth, except the flavor followed past your mouth is what I called it. Well, it's a good thing I hit cigarettes off my sister and her menthol, because I'm so used to flavored, the menthol tobacco was, um, tolerable? I almost kinda liked it. But I've tried menthol tobacco flavors, menthol flavors, peppermint, spearmint, etc. juices, and found them gross. So my brief foray into the Kingdom of Kool cigarettes was just that, a brief foray, and I won't be picking up any Kewl flavored juice, lol, as far as I know.

But THE single most stressful situation is over with, with an outcome better what we predicted (okay, my side of the family tends to be pessimistic).

So I've started a new counter. The VT counter doesn't count beginning the hour you had your last analog, but your first day without an analog...so it's off by maybe, 12 hours, lol. But I won't quibble about that.

[Raven1]

Ehh it happens I keep a pack of old analogs I have not used them for nine weeks but just a safety net. Stress etc. Your only human but back on track no problem at all. Once I started vaping I decided I would not become one of those. My wife might smoke a pack if that a day of analogs but it don't bother me. Full time worker and full time college student myself I could see it happening if I let it get to me. I just had a good vape in salute to you. You will be fine.

[Jeffb]

No biggie. Just keep pushing on. You can do it.

[bcartervol98]

What helped me get past analogs is the fact I like the way nicotine gets into my system this way better vaping than smoking. I have said many times if it were found that smoking and vaping posed completely equal health risks, I would still continue to vape over smoking if I did either.

You are fine, its a process lots of people struggle with. You can get back in the wagon, thats the beauty of it!

[Aquatroy]

What did ya have one, maybe two? give yourself a break, why didn't you vape? Better nic that way, I actually enjoy vaping near smokers, it's like watching them stab themselves ! Don't fret, pat yourself on the back for what you have already accomplished, and get back in the wagon ! Maybe this time, wear your seatbelt!

[Tam]

For me I don't look at vaping as either/or -- I can only have one or not the other and if I smoke a cigarette I have failed. Look at it this way: I choose to vape today. I can have a cigarette if I really want one but I'm choosing not to right now. It takes the stress off. I've tried a few here and there to see if it still had the same hold on me that it once did. After a couple of drags I had to go brush my teeth and take a shower to get the smell off and the taste out of my mouth.

Don't beat yourself up over it. You're vaping again and that's what counts. No stress. Life throws enough your way, don't create it where it doesn't exist.

[IMEDICx90]

I smoked a single cigarette when my grandmother passed away. I don't consider it a set back or a failure. My batteries were dead in my mods and I had a high stress level. I'm not ashamed of it and neither am I going to reset my counter. We have all been there. your doing just fine!

[Aquatroy]

Oh Matt, the shame! , I'm so dissapointed in you... You let your batteries die?!?!?

[IMEDICx90]

Yeah I was back and forth and forgot to charge them. I had a lot on my mind those few days. :/ but to their credit they lasted over 2 days each. Lol.

[spydre]

For me I don't look at vaping as either/or -- I can only have one or not the other and if I smoke a cigarette I have failed. Look at it this way: I choose to vape today. I can have a cigarette if I really want one but I'm choosing not to right now. It takes the stress off. I've tried a few here and there to see if it still had the same hold on me that it once did. After a couple of drags I had to go brush my teeth and take a shower to get the smell off and the taste out of my mouth.

Don't beat yourself up over it. You're vaping again and that's what counts. No stress. Life throws enough your way, don't create it where it doesn't exist.

I'm still up about it. I mean, in the last - oh, I'm not sure how long, other than the first year we moved into this house (I think that was 10 years ago?) I've never made it to 24 hours. The time before that, with the aid of the patch, I made it a few days...but then I couldn't successfully deal with the psychological what do I do with my hands when I should be smoking....and then I figured out that the mg of nicotine in the highest patch dwarfed my usual nic intake on a daily basis, so I would have one here or there....and it was all over from there, lol.

See, that's the thing. My brain is trying to make sure I know the smoking IS either/or. Either I quit, or I don't. I don't quit, my MS can/will progress faster. I've known that for four years, and been working on quitting for four years. Plus, frankly, added to that, it makes my fibromyagia worse. I had started having an occasional cough (that I haven't had since Jul 29, I believe. It was two days after we smoked our last analogs together (July 27 at 2 am, not the ones I cheated with). So yeah, there is part of me going "you have to do this, you have to do this to get better" - or at least not get any worse.

But this WILL happen, this IS working. Frankly, I give anyone the challenge of going through what I was going through, that newly off analogs, being around people WITH analogs, and not pick up an analog, and frankly, with what she had been told before, her last episode, my whole family was given the impression that she was going to lose her leg.

BTW, she's good now. The doctor managed to be able to angioplasty the 100% blockage in her bypass, and she's coming home today. So no more fear, no more stress, other than the normal anxieties, stress, and getting used to my son having moved into college yesterday.

[spydre]

Matt, that reminds me, the night of my son's party, I took a battery fresh off the battery charger (ego stick 900 mah battery), plus the battery I was currently using to the party. When the battery I was currently using died, it was out of the blue, no blinking blue light, nothing - that was about an hour before the party ended. So I switched to the battery that WAS freshly charged when I took it off the charger. Didn't vape that much, if at all, for the rest of party. I guess we got home about 10:30, went to bed around 2, and my "fresh" battery died, despite having been turned off when it was in the carrying case.

[Tam]

Sounds like you might want to look into getting new batteries. They should hold a charge for longer than that. Glad you're back on the wagon and stress levels have evened out.

[spydre]

Sounds like you might want to look into getting new batteries. They should hold a charge for longer than that. Glad you're back on the wagon and stress levels have evened out.

See, that's the thing. These are the eGo batteries that came with the starter kit, which I got just about a month ago. I have it in more detail in the it's broke forum.

[IMEDICx90]

Doesn't matter Spyder. The QC is pretty terrible sometimes. That's why we get dud coils and such. You could just have a bad set of batteries. :/